When I was sixteen, if you had told me that in the fairly-near future, I would have to be horseless, I would have told you that there was absolutely no way in hell that that would be the case. I'm not sure I could have even imagined a life without horses in it. I don't think I could have survived it at that period in my life.
But today, I've been horsesless for a month and 2 days and you know what? I'm really doing okay.
I've had SEVERAL people tell me that they don't think they could make the same decision I did, which puzzles me a little, because we do what we need to do when it comes to the animals we love, but everyone has their own priorities and while I don't love horses any less, I know exactly what I want in life. What is came down to is this: as hard as it was, I could imagine a world where Missy had an amazing home other myself. What I couldn't imagine was cheating myself out of something I know with all my heart is what I want. Period. This is it for me. I want this more than I have ever wanted anything else in my entire life.
I freely admit that it is HARD sometimes. I'm pretty hard on myself because I know that the vet school acceptance rate hovers around 11% (yes, ELEVEN) and I want in on application cycle numero uno. So yeah, I study my butt off and give up a lot of the social stuff and I'm probably a tad obsessed. I'm not a hermit, though, by any means and I have fun with my friends (my friend and I went to a Brad Paisley concert a couple weeks ago...I had never seen him in concert. WHAT.A.BLAST.). It's definitely about balance. I'm pretty lucky, though, I figured it out pretty quick and started strong. A lot of people screw around their first year and then have to play catch-up in the GPA game for the next several years. But I've learned HOW to study and I plan out my week and divide the work appropriately. Most of all, I don't procrastinate.
Life is enjoyable, though, I'm involved in a lot of student orgs and I spend a good bit of my time being involved and volunteering. I especially love working with the SNAP program in the county (Spay and Neuter Assistance Program) because I get the opportunity to talk to a lot people and hear their stories, while at the same time helping their pets. One less reproductively-capable dog and cat in the world makes my heart happy! Prevention is the best kind of medicine there is, in all forms...
Next week is a busy one. My singular Tuesday class is canceled and so I'm meeting up with the ever-fabulous Dr. J to go acupuncture like 8 horses, and then next weekend I'm driving home (again) to go to a conference with her...yay for kick-ass mentors!
Is this the life I imagined? Nope. But I'm happy and I know what I want...the craziest part is, I'm starting to really believe I can do this! :D